For the past 21 years of life I have put other people before myself. My parents, my friends, my significant others, even strangers sometimes, but recently I’ve made the drastic decision that I was going to start choosing myself, and for me that’s easier said than done.
All throughout high school I was in a bad relationship, he cheated on me and I was to blinded by the idea of what I thought was love I never believed anyone or anything. I was never first in his book if we’re being completely honest I was never even second or third. Fast forward a few years and I thought I found a guy who I could see future with, however I was wrong. It was the same ole same ole’ I wasn’t put before his friends, or his alcohol so I let go before it became toxic. Honestly, if you’re wondering why I’m telling you all this random stuff it’s because lately I’ve been struggling with myself, my identity, and my idea of what beauty is.
You see all three of those things were never easy for me in my walk with Christianity as a teen. I was never as skinny as the other girls, or thought i was beautiful as they were and it hindered my relationship with are Father. Even now these are still issues I face on a day to day basis. But recently I found the answer and as simple and stupid as it sounds all you have to do is believe in His word and CHOOSE YOU.
Choose going to church over going out. Choose yourself over a guy, or friends, or frenemies. Choose joy. Choose to love yourself. Choose to laugh more. Choose to workout more. Choose to eat healthier. But whatever you choose make sure it is only for you.
The creator of the Heavens and Earth chose you, loves you, and thinks that you are worthy and beautiful beyond measures. So why is it so hard for us to believe that we aren’t? I hope that starting today you choose yourself, you realize your self worth, and you love yourself just the way you are.
In the meantime I’ll be praying for you, talk to you all soon.